Andy Cohen's Hamptons Ten
Plus: Bobbi Brown's community spirit; a dead whale at a Montauk trailer park for billionaires; and the East End's very best pie.
Last night, a phalanx of Florida-tanned, gold bracelet-stacked swells squeezed into the new East Hampton restaurant Lion’s Nook to honor Hamptons Community Outreach. As THC (and New York Times) readers know, the organization started by Swedish social worker Marit Molin works tirelessly on behalf of the often forgotten, usually immigrant communities that trim hedges and wash dishes in this playground for rich people.
Bobbi Brown introduced Molin to a crowd drinking rosé and munching on pigs in blankets. The restaurant’s owner Alex Rossi, known for keeping former Pollock and De Kooning haunt Springs Tavern alive, seemed excited to christen his new spot. Molin spoke about some of the work the organization has done, including coordinating dental work, building homes, and helping provide basics like food and clothing. The crowd, which included Brooke Shields, Candace Bushnell, and Molly Jong-Fast, wept—and hopefully, will open their checkbooks.
I’m headed to the NOMAD fair shortly, for a picnic by Cove chef Flynn McGarry hosted by exhibitor Giorgio Armani. As it’s raining, hopefully there will be some chic umbrellas. (Speaking of which, the great designer Patrick McGrath once recommended the Serena and Lily Lake Stripe Fringe Umbrella and the Tuuci Ocean Master Hexagon Umbrella to me when I was looking to replace my outdoor umbrella. I ended up getting one from L.L. Bean.)
In today’s The Hamptons Chronicle, Andy Cohen’s favorite spots, a whale washes up on the shore near Montauk’s $3 million trailers, and our very first Hydrangea Award. This post is free! But as you may have noticed, some posts are now available only to paid subscribers—join the club.
Andy Cohen’s Hamptons Haunts
Andy Cohen is my celebrity imaginary friend. I fantasize about walking out of a dinner at the Corner Bistro with Andy*, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Amy Sedaris to newfallen snow, or rocking out with Andy at a Dead and Co. show at the Sphere. This week’s Architectural Digest feature on Andy’s beachfront Amagansett house was catnip to me, but it was also torture. Lines like this gave me an irrational sense of FOMO: ”When he entertains, long cocktail hours unfold on the roof terrace, tequila and Fresca flowing, before everyone migrates to the dining tables—one indoors for 14, the other outdoors for eight.” That’s room for 22 people. Surely sometimes Kelly Ripa drops out—I can cook.
I’m a disciple of Andy’s diaries, which are Warhol-esque in the sense that he writes about knowing everyone and appearing everywhere at once. The author, radio host, and Bravo impresario behind Watch What Happens Live and The Real Housewives franchise has the indefatigable energy of a winner—but the Hamptons is where he goes to unwind. In his diaries he often talks about arriving out east late on Friday night and going straight to Sam’s Pizza in East Hampton where he orders a medium mushroom-and-onion pizza, well done.
I was thrilled when the King of Sam’s, the Daddy Deadhead, and Anderson Cooper’s bestie agreed to participate in The Hamptons Chronicle’s signature questionnaire, where we ask insiders about their favorite east-end spots.
Describe your perfect Hamptons day.
Take the mini convertible to Goldberg’s in Montauk for flagels with the kids, hang on my beach all day, Sam’s Pizza for dinner.
What’s your favorite spot for a drink?
My jacuzzi.
What’s your secret shopping spot?
The Ladies Village Improvement Society.
Who would you love to bump into at the farmer’s market?
SJP.
What’s your main gripe about the Hamptons?
The traffic!
What would be your dream dinner?
It’s always Sam’s Restaurant in East Hampton for house salad and a medium mushroom/onion pizza.
What’s your advice to newbies about a visit out east?
Have friends to hang with… don’t go chasing glamour.
Where do you go in the Hamptons to be alone?
My beach.
Who can’t you live without in the Hamptons?
My friend Fred knows everything and is handy.
Who makes the best lobster roll?
Lunch!
*I broke my own self-imposed THC style guide of using last names on second mention, because Andy is my imaginary friend and it feels weird to call him “Cohen.”
Other Hamptons Ten participants have included Estelle Bailey-Babenzien, Katie Couric, and Jenna Lyons.
A Whale of a Smell
Today, a stench is wafting across Montauk’s so-called trailer park, where billionaires pay over $3 million for beachfront mobile homes. A juvenile humpback whale washed up in the shallow water near Ditch Plains beach, creating an odor that local surf instructor Corey Senese called “the worst smell I’ve ever smelled.”
Humpback whales feed on menhaden fish close to shore, following baitfish into nearshore coastal waters. They can get hit by boats, entangled with fishing equipment, or die of natural causes. The rock embankment that protects the trailer park may make the traditional sand burial difficult as authorities figure out what to do with the whale today. Meanwhile, surfers are stressing. One told me, “The problem is sharks will be trying to get to shore to feed on it. And once sharks get a habit of checking for food in a certain spot they always just come to check just in case.”
Normally, humpback whales can live up to 90 years old.
Best Pie: Briermere Farms Cream Pie
I’m not shy about calling out the best things; just ask my friends. The best red nail polish? Essie’s A-List. The best tote bag? Pacific Tote Company’s Catalina. So as I wade through endless press releases, social-media posts, and testimonials, I will endeavor to bring you The Best of the Hamptons. This is an extremely subjective—yet informed—process. The winners will be bestowed a “Hydrangea Award,” which, for now, will be an Instagram post and bragging rights. But I could see a gala awards ceremony in our future.
This week, the Hydrangea Award for Best Pie in the Hamptons goes to Briermere Farms in Riverhead, NY. While researching my story for New York’s Hamptons issue on bougie baked goods, I went to a lot of farmstands and bakeries and interviewed the area’s most legendary hosts and hostesses. Many of them named Briermeres’ cream-fruit pies as the ultimate east-end baked good. Philanthropist and jewelry designer Brooke Garber Neidich, personal chef Robyn Henderson-Diederiks, bookseller Cleo Le-Tan, and photography agent Skylar Pittman all swear by Briermere’s pies.
Clark McComb, the Yale-educated oldest brother of Briermere’s farming family, crankily declined my interview request. But that won’t stop me from driving an hour to pay $45 for his blueberry, strawberry, and peach cream pies.
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"Where do you go in the Hamptons to be alone?"
"My beach."
Andy doesn't need to make much of an effort, does he?
Still haven’t gotten a pie yet this summer, need to!